He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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