Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
