Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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