Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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