STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
