why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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