my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize