Cold hands, warm shart.
The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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