I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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