Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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