Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Randomize
