Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
