This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I believe in your delicious
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
