Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
