Whatcha textin bout Willis?
we made out on top of his cat.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
