Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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