Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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