Heybabeimwearingurpanties
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
