She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
