Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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