dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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