Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
