drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
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