fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Swine flu is the new snow day.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Randomize
