Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Randomize
