Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
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