god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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