Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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