The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
