pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
