just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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