She went from zero to smokin in five shots
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
