I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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