are you still at the devil's house?
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize