They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
