I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
