so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
We had to coat check the pizza.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm sobbing to NWA
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
