that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
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