She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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