Her vagina should come with caution tape.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
