I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
