I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
