Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
