Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
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