This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize