We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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