just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
