We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize