As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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