Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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