question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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